This is the kind of book that is taxing to your mind. It's basically an emotional investment when you read this book. This is why it took me six months to actually finish it. On days that I felt too tired, physically and mentally, I just couldn't make myself read the book.

I know, drama queen.

My first book by Gregory Maguire was Wicked, of course. HIGHLY recommended, btw. I didn't even want to read the sequels because I don't think I can handle another emotional experience with Maguire's Oz. Duh-raaa-maaa. So I happily picked up Confessions of an Ugly Stepsister because I still wanted to read Maguire's writings but without prior 'awareness' of the world that he has created. Fresh eyes, so to speak. Beware, spoilers galore.

Don't say I didn't warn you!

Confessions is the re-telling of Cinderella, from the point of view of the 'ugly' stepsister. As a fantasy novel, the story is without any magic/ supernatural elements at all. Superstitions were implied, but everything is reality-based and... humanized. The ugly stepsisters, Iris and Ruth, are neither ugly nor evil. Iris, the main POV of this story, is not a conventional beauty, but she is multi-faceted and relatable. Ruth is mute and incapable of taking care of herself, almost autistic, however towards the end Maguire surprises us with a twist concerning Ruth. Clara i.e. Cinderella, is potrayed as an outer-worldly beauty, but she loathes the attention that falls upon her, and feels imprisoned by it. She is always fearful and resentful, for in her mind her beauty is more of a curse than a reward. She prefers to stay by the fire in the kitchen, and will leave Iris to shoulder all the responsibilities outside of the kitchen, and bear the brunt of Margarethe (Clara's stepmother, Iris & Ruth's biological mother) schemings. I am still conflicted, however, on whether to judge Margarethe as evil, because she is only doing what she does for the survival of her children (and herself). At that time, the only career option available for a respectable lady/ widow is marriage. And to survive, you need to marry a wealthy man. Is being a gold digger wrong, when you only want to put food on the table for your family? Should I, then, excuse Margarethe's often heartless schemings? I'm so conflicted! Clara is more of a brat, which in turn brings out the worst in Margarethe, because she is used to obedience by Iris & Ruth. During the infamous ball, despite her fervent confidence that she would never be the object of interest of the Prince, Iris did manage to capture the Prince's attention with her wit, until Clara comes in, and the Prince's attention immediately turned towards the beautifully clothed masked lady. Men.

I think with this story, Maguire is trying to highlight how we, as a society, would focus on the physical beauty of a person, and how we often judge positively towards those who has the advantage of being conventionally beautiful, while those who lack what society deemed as beauty, would often be judged harshly. Beauty = kindness, Ugly = evil. With this book, Maguire highlights what is often the reality of the matter, that more times than not, it's the other way around. It's like the theory of evolution: when you're considered as ugly and gets mistreated by society, out of sheer need you have to develop a good personality to gain the approval of others. Those who are considered as conventionally beautiful, do not need to work as hard at gaining approval. It comes to them rather easily, therefore they don't need to develop their personality. Ok, massive generalization, and I'm guilty of making the same assumptions based on physical looks. I guess this book is just pointing out the reality of the world, and maybe one day we as a society will be evolved enough to realize that physical beauty is irrelevant without substance. 

Apparently, this story was made into a tv movie back in 2002 (source). Not sure about the casting, because they're all... pretty. 

Hollywood, FAIL.

Other than that, another great story by Gregory Maguire. Highly recommended. Read Wicked first though, if you haven't.

And my obsession with baby Mikail.

Hehehehe.

Last weekend I babysat him while his parents went to their friend’s wedding dinner. He was sleeping when they left him with me, and when he woke up 2 hours later, he looked confused and scared of his surrounding. Even when I picked him up, he kept looking at me like… "You’re not my mommy. Are you my mommy?” . He kept touching my face, poking my eye, pinching my nose… as if trying to make sure that I’m real, eventhough I’m not his mommy. Awwwwwwwwww, Mikail it’s your aunty lah!

At that time, Mulan was on Disney (duh, of course I had Disney channel on) and for awhile he was distracted watching the show, so I quietly left him at the sofa bed and went to make his milk. He realized 10 seconds later that he was alone and he WAIIIIIIIIIIILLLED. So I made myself visible in his line of sight, and he calmed down a bit, but when I went back into the kitchen he started crying again. I had to carry him while making his milk. FYI, this dude is 10kg okke. TEN. But I love you anyways, Mikail!

It was uneventful after that, really, except when he saw the remote at the end of the sofa bed and he slithered (yes, snake-like ) so fast to get it, that he was only a couple of inches away from falling off the sofa bed before I got to him. Baby, baby. Aunty is old already okke, very weak heart. Cannot get shocks like that anymore.

This weekend my brother, sis-in-law and Mikail will be going back to my sis-in-law’s kampung in Baling, so I won’t see him this time… sigh. Missing you already, Mika!

Hehehehe… LOLcatmika.

… is what work is right now. Steps I did to cheer myself up:

1. Dark Berry Mocha Frapp

Had one with Nurin, Fozi and lil’ Hani yesterday. I didn’t even tell the barista to replace the milk with soy, eventhough I’m lactose intolerant. And guess what, the Frapp was good and calorie-laden, but that night I made multiple visits to the toilet. It was worth it. The Frapp, not the visits. TMI?

2. Bubblegum pop

Insomnia is the single from Craig David’s Greatest Hits album. I don’t know if I should reveal this, but I had his first album back-in-the-day before he sold out to the American market… blergh. I think Insomnia is pretty great, reminiscence of the ol’ him. According to wiki, Craig David asked Wheesung (korean pop star – – the next Rain?) to do a cover of the single in Korean.

Craig David:

Wheesung:

“LUB.LUB.LUB.LUUBB..”. Hehehehehe. I like the Korean one better and I don’t know why. And don’t even LIE by saying that this song doesn’t get stuck in your head. Just don’t, ok?

3. Nasi Lemak

My comfort food. Had one for brunch with Karen and Chung Ee this morning. I am so fat!

4. Chocolate-dipped fruits

I had two chocolate bars in the fridge since, like, forever, and because I felt guilty from having the Frapp yesterday and nasi lemak this morning, I thought I’d make this snack… healthier… by having fruits in it. Uh-huh. I melted the chocolates and dipped pear slices in the melted-chocolate sauce while watching The Biggest Loser on tv. I am so fat!

I was thisclose to stop at Berjaya Times Square to get myself a Krispy Kreme. THISCLOSE.

5. Baby Mikail

Looking at his pictures give me warm fuzzy feelings. Awwwwwwwwwwwwwww my uterus is crying!